I Did Something Extremely Uncomfortable - and More!

Published: Wed, 07/11/18


I've started getting emails from y'all because it's unusual for me to go missing for 4-5 days straight. So I want to explain why. For years you've seen me mention a bad marriage and divorce and to be honest with you, I carried that fear and anger around with me for years. 

I can hold a grudge like no one can - but only because it feels protective. If I'm keeping people away and not risking anything, I'm safe. But safe and comfortable doesn't always mean that's what best for you. 

This week my ex husband spent 5 days here and for the first 3 days I seethed as I normally do, reliving the past over and over in my head. But on the next to the last day, I did something terrifying and long overdue. I decided to forgive him - to forgive myself - to put the past to rest and move on with a clean slate. I'd spent the previous night awake until 5 AM arguing with myself over what the right path would be - playing devil's advocate and "what iffing" about worst case scenarios. 

But the next day, I went outside - hands shaking - and spoke to him and his fiance and we all laughed and hugged. It's been a decade of hate tied like a ball and chain to me, that suddenly is gone. I was honest about my faulty thinking - about how I had harbored such ill will. About how I had always slapped a phony smile on my face to interact with him in the past. I had to be genuine or else this wouldn't have worked. 

How did I do it? For me, it was a lot of prayer and recognizing that this was going to be uncomfortable, period. "Do it afraid - courage will come later," that's what I always say.

I talked myself through it - I knew that in business and other areas of my life, I'd done that, so why not with this?

Our comfort zones are fool's gold. They're a mirage of happiness. They're not what they seem. I thought I was doing great being civil to him, but scowling on the inside. The reality is it held me back. I focused on what made me FEEL good - all of his faults, none of mine. None of his good qualities. I certainly couldn't remember those. 

And then I mustered up the courage to set myself free. It was a beautiful thing. It's STILL scary - this just happened the day before yesterday. But I feel good about it and I see a much better future. 

It's kind of strange that right when this was all happening, Aurelius Tjin emailed me about his latest PLR launching - and it said something about the "Road Untaken." It was so fitting. I sat in my chair and read it and you know how, when you are going through something significant, you apply things you're reading to that situation? Well that's what I did. 

It's the kind of book that could apply to any difficult journey - financial struggle, relationship healing, parenting, health. I think page 32 was my favorite. It was titled, "Stop Scaring Yourself." Oh how true that was. I was scared. And I was doing that to myself. All this time I thought HE was doing it TO me. 

Anyway, it's been an emotionally draining yet uplifting week. I couldn't focus on work because I was just trying to better myself and sometimes that's a difficult thing to achieve. You fight it. You want to stay in that comfort zone. One the well-traveled road. Not go off on some unknown journey that might end badly. 

I now consider my ex a friend. I will put to bed the past and focus on the benefits he can bring to our lives. I adored his fiance. She was kind and amazing. I'm very happy for them. I hope and will focus on a brighter future - one where we can laugh and rejoice when our kids get married or have kids and we're around each other. 

Anyway, mushy and deep - sorry - if you want to read the eBook or buy the entire biz in a box package of Aurelius, it's an amazingly good product and it's on earlybird sale here:

https://jvz3.com/c/5810/306202

I'm getting my enormous Survival launch ready for Sunday, but I'll be working back on the challenge soon and the implementation bonuses, so stay tuned for that. 

Oh! Almost forgot - Jennifer Anderson is retiring 17 of her fantastic packs and she bundled them up for a final sale. 

It's not open until 10 AM EST but the bundle includes the following packs:

1. Family Juicing
2. Paleo While Traveling
3. Thyroid
4. Holiday Weight Loss
5. Arthritis
6. Boosting Fertility
7. Men's Health
8. 21-Day Fix
9. Reiki
10. Insomnia
11. Quit Smoking
12. Instant Pot Cooking
13. Breaking Sugar Addiction
14. Type 2 Diabetes
15. Intro to Pilates
16. Raising Healthy Kids
17. Low Carb Diets

You can find that here:

https://jvz3.com/c/5810/305737

Okay I hope y'all have a great day - life is good. You just have to take a leap of faith sometimes. 

Tiff ;)

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